Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Who Took My Smarties???

Along the lines of "what were they thinking" I have to ask who put giant JAWBREAKERS in the conference room candy dishes? And what happened to the smarties? now that was a funny pun! And the tiny chocolate hershey bars and krackles? Where did they go?
OH I'm sorry, are you lost?


See recently our conference rooms (and we have oh 20 or 30 of them) replaced the boring mint candy dishes with funky candy. Sometimes there are jolly rogers, or butterscotch or caramels or tootsie rolls. On a great day you get some Hershey mini-candy mixed in. (remember, lawyers are cheap bastards who will stop at nothing for free food) Sometimes there are smarties, which I think is a hilarious pun. Plus I love them.


Yesterday I went in to raid the candy dishes - Monday mornings are the best because they've refilled them for the week - and what do I find? GIANT JAW BREAKERS. Ok, that's funny, too, because who the hell can have a conversation with a mouth full of giant candy? So they're trying to get us to either 1) stop stealing the candy or 2) shut up during meetings. Or both. Well hell, you can't stop me, I took the jaw breakers back to my desk while writing my latest report, and lamented the loss of the chocolate and the smarties.


Sigh.

9 comments:

Paranoid said...

Mmm, free candy. I kind of miss sneaking into the conference room at 6pm to rustle through the dishes for the coveted Andes candies.

I can think of a few people I'd have loved to offer a jawbreaker...

MadMad said...

Are they the kind that fit in your mouth or do you have to kinda hold them there and get sticky goo and slobber all over your papers? Cuz that could be an issue, right? I think you need to involve HR. For SURE. This can't go on.

The Girl Next Door said...

PARANOID: Ah yes, the Andes. Haven't seen them in a LONG time

MADMAD: LOL here, they fit in my mouth. But then sometimes people tell me I have a big mouth! Imagine....

Anonymous said...

that seriously sucks. i never understood hard candy, especially jaw breakers. if i'm doing sugar, it has to be chocolate.

btw, loving the new banner. and i'm seriously wondering who plants those lovely flowers in the second story planters? tell me you have people!

Carol P. said...

But do they have Pez?

My secret for discussion-free meetings is to bring bagels. Way too chewy for conversation, but I can get a lot of nods of agreement...

I like the new style too! I've been wayyyyyy too busy to change over, but it's been on my to-do list for, er, years.

Suzanne said...

This is funny. I am afraid of jawbreakers...because of the name. I need my jaw.

Anonymous said...

does this mean the PURPOSE of the "pointless" meetings are so the men can eat junk food without being bitched at by their well-meaning wives?

dkuroiwa said...

oh man...Smarties!!!! I LOVE those!!! They are sometimes just. the. right. little bit of sweet and tart inside your mouth!!
I have a strange way of eating them....always 2 at a time...chewing on the left side, then, for the next 2...on the right side. There are eleven Smarties in a little package...so that last one....it's a free-for-all!!! :-D

Unknown said...

I used to keep a candy jar at my desk and fill it with miniature hersheys (kisses, crackels, mr. goodbars, etc) or other stuff, but then I gave up because nobody ever contributed (lawyers aren't the only cheap ones in business) and the only time someone would speak to you was to complain....