Thank you Random Kind Sir

Gearing up for trial - my first in Florida, my first in many years (we settle everything or so it seems).  Working very late last night - a rare event in my new life I am happy to say.  But honestly and selfishly totally consumed by my own challenges and letting this trial take over my life.

I finally starting thinking about packing up my briefcase for home when I get a text from the Captain.  Something about running out of gas and cash and being stranded at the side of the road. without his AAA card.

So I flew out of the office, grateful he wasn't far and was actually on my way home.

Then I realized I misread his text.

He had gone out to GET cash and gas (both accomplished) when the car made noises and quit.

OK the car breaking down part I got right anyway.

So we called AAA on my card, I sent him home for his warranty stuff while I waited.  We were in a bank parking lot, well lit, no problem. I walked next door to grab a diet coke.  The young man behind the counter offered me samples of various liquors (it was a liquor store) but I said no thanks, just waiting for AAA to rescue the dead car, just a diet coke.  We chatted a bit.  The young man said, "Wow you're in a good mood for such an event!"  I said, "Well life happens.  It could have been much worse.  The dealer is up the road.  It will all work out."  And I left.

I walked next door to the car and sat a moment - the wind was blowing so naturally I was cold at 75 degrees and got in the car.

Then I realize there's a man in a gorgeous BMW motioning to me and holding out a business card.

Seems he overheard my conversation at the liquor store.  He works at the BMW place where we are taking the car.  He gave me the name of the head service guy, asked if there was anything he could do to help, had me start up the car (which he had to help me do because it has a push button and not a normal key and no I never ever drive the Captain's new BMW I am afraid of it), and with the noise it was making he agreed towing was the good choice.

Then he went on his way. 

And I thought, "WOW - he totally didn't have to do that!"  It was late - I'm sure he was tired after a long day.  But he took the 10 minutes to stop and offer to help.

That was awesome.

This morning at the dealer, the Captain found the head service guy, dropped a name, got well taken care of.

I hope "Peter" has a wonderful, awesome day and that the good karma he created when he stopped last night continues to follow him.

A reminder to Pay It Forward, to practice random acts of kindness, and to be thankful that when challenges come we can keep them in perspective.

 

Addictions come in all forms

There are lots of addictions.

I'm not sure they're all bad.

I'm not sure they can all be categorized.

I'm not sure I have just one.

But today we'll talk about my shoe addiction.

Now, I would say I don't have an addiction (step one - denial right?)

Because although I do have some a lot a shit ton of shoes, I don't HAVE to have EVERY pair I see.  I go years months weeks without buying any.  I give away a lot of pair - particularly when I need to make room for new ones.

And I won't buy just any shoe.  No, gone are the days of cheap shoes.  Because I hit that phase.  And I tried the "shoe clubs."  And I bought these:

OH yeah they are cute.  And they set off my black and white block print sheath very nicely.  Got lots of compliments today.  Even the Gyro guy noticed (no he's not gay and so what if he were?!).  But walk more than 32 feet?  OUCH.  Cheap shoes = pain.  So I've learned that lesson.  But every once in a while I wear these anyway (I admit $39.99).

But sometimes, on a frustrating afternoon, while I'm at work...working...I am called to the Internet where lurk great shoe sales.

Like recently.
Now I have these - my current go-to- I'mgonnakickyourassincourt favorites.  I can walk miles in these.  They are hot.  They are comfortable.  They were originally let's just say expensive but I found them on sale for under $80.

Simple.  Black.  adorable black bow on the front with a peep toe (It's not professional to wear open toe shoes?  What?  sorry mom that was yesterday).  Adrienne Vittadini.  5 inch heel.  I swear I am the Queen of the Universe in these.

But alas, they are showing their age.  Scuffs on the heels that can't be repaired.  Plus, supershoes only have so much superpower.

So I was thinking perhaps I needed new superblack superpumps.

And Cole Haan was having a great sale and I missed it.  I put the slate grey suede calf boots in my cart but forgot to close the deal.  65% off down the drain.

what do you mean they weren't black or pumps?  focus people focus.  Cool cute shoes on sale...

did I forget to mention I never ever ever pay full price for shoes ever, which is why I'm pretty sure I will never own a pair of Jimmy Choos as much as I totally love love love them.

So I Googled Cole Haan....and up came these....

The picture stinks (gave Son the camera for his semester abroad, I'm left with my phone camera) but they are Cole Haan Nike Air 5" support patent leather pumps with a very professional open toe.  Perfect new I'm gonnakickyourassincourt shoes.  On sale.  even better than Cole Haan's sale - %75 off.  Free shipping.  SOLD.

But wait.  What else came up in that search?

Oh My Goodness.  Something about hairfur.  Cole Haan nike air.  5" heels (my fav - I'm a shrimp).  A sweet blue line going through the heel for a nice accent.  Because me and Blue?  Almost as perfect together as the Captain and me.

again %75 off.  Again free shipping.  SOLD.

AND I get the thrill of buying and then a few days /week later they come in the mail!  Fun all over again.  Then we debut them at work where my shoe-loving Jimmy Choo owning office manager appropriately notices the shoes and we have a nice chat about the love of shoes, our addictions, why shoes make us feel good.

And I know I've blogged about this shoe thing before.  But sometimes, when things aren't going your way, a client is nasty, opposing counsel is horrid, the kids just don't get it, you realize you really aren't ever going to lose the 10 pounds you've gained last year, you look down at your feet and you smile and say, "Yeah, but I've got great shoes."

First world problems?  Yes.  Do I feel a little guilty about that?  Yes.

Guilty enough to send the money I spend on shoes to a third world country instead of buying the shoes?  Sadly, no.  although I try to match my shoe spending to my charitable giving.

Does that count?

probably not...that's why they call it addiction...

Finding Motivation at the Beach

Once again I find myself at the beach.  Except this time it's pretty far north in FL where it's too cold to actually go to the beach and I'm at a work function.

As usual I moaned and groaned about this 3 days away from my "real" job with too much to do and no interest in schmoozing.

Then I shut up and listened.

And I discovered I work for a pretty cool, very successful company that might actually interest me in the long run.

I mean, I know I work for a fortune 500 company.  And I know they make money.  And I feel pretty confident in my job security.

But this week we saw numbers and heard pitches from CFO's and CLO's and CEO's about the company, the legal initiative, and what my future might look like here, particularly if I am successful in wooing the folks who hire legal support to hire me (as in house litigation) rather than continuing to hire the more expensive (and of course less awesome) outside counsel.  I realized that this in house group to which I belong has formed and grown and saved the company millions of dollars in the last few years, and that we are seen as a huge success story.  I realize that my little job in my little office in my little world is actually contributing to the greater good.  And that feels good.  I feel like I am starting to understand this company.  I'm seeing how it has been innovative over the last 5 years in order to stay profitable (even grow!) in this tough economy.

And that feels good.

Then the boss ORDERED us all to go out to lunch in our pre-assigned "mingling groups" and to drink a lot, eat a lot, and just get to know each other.  FUNNY!

As part of my new initiative to contribute more to the future of the company and not just collect  a paycheck, I drank an entire bottle of wine and made lots of jokes with my colleagues!  I'm such a good listener to the boss.

Time for a nap before dinner....

 

The Old Lady in the Shoe

Once upon a time there was a mom with twins in school who was newly divorced, with a full time (and then some) job who juggled divorce stuff, kid stuff, job stuff, dating (?!) stuff and then some.

Then the twins left her and went to college.

She cried a lot.  Worked more.  Planned for when they would visit.

Then she got a new job.  Left the lonely home.  Moved to a warmer climate.  Moved in with the Perfect Captain.

She left the blogging world for a while.  then she tried to return.

But she felt like the old woman in the shoe.  Except without the children.

She visited blogs about life and chaos and kids and stuff.  And thought 'I remember when."

She read posts about kids and movies and allowances and thought "My views are so oooooold"

Am I really that old?  I am 46.  My kids are 20.

Yet somehow I feel like the old woman in the shoe.  Who once had so many children (because her kids' friends and their friends and the friends of friends seemingly ended up at my house...) she didn't know what to do.

And now?  I have so much time on my hands.  I just don't know what to do......
I find that I have lost the drive that had me running everywhere so fast, I wondered myself how I didn't spontaneously combust.  Yes I have joined a gym in an attempt to lose weight and get in shape.  Yes the Captain and I spend a LOT of time together - watching movies, hanging out on the couch talking, sailing, planning adventures.

Oh and if you ask him, we get our fair share of visitors.  (Like no room at the inn or on the floor for Christmas, overlapping winter breakers that will have 8 adults sleeping in a very small 3 bedroom house, and no news yet on spring break but last year we had 6-8 kids for a week....)

But still, in between visits, I feel like I waste so much time.  Gone from so much to do to...what to do?

anyone else understand this debacle???

Confounded by technology...crap I am my mother

once upon a time there was blogspot.com.  And there were templates.  And it was simple.

Then you discovered there were coded things behind the templates and you messed with the codes to change your basic template.  And if [when] you messed it all up you could "delete" and "revert'.

Then you left the blogging world for 147 years oh wait 18 months.

And you tried to blog again,.

But gmail had a new system.  And finding out just how to post a damn post became a herculean effort.

and following those blogs you used to follow?  forgetabboutit.

Not to mention messing with your design.

and after days/weeks/years/decades of spending time trying to figure it out, you accept what is, forget trying to change what you don't like and realize...

crap I am my mom.  We call the younger generation to sort out the "computer issues" and realize we just. can't. keep. up. with . technology.

Sigh.  am I alone here/????

Seasons? We have seasons!!

People ask me all the time, "Do you miss the seasons?"

What?

We have seasons.

For example, like the buds that first push through the ground in March up north, they start to appear here, except in October.

They come, first one by one, parking themselves in the center lane of A1A, aka Beach Road.  As October turns to November and then December, it becomes a cacophony of car carriers, convoyed down the center line, offloading the Caddies, Buicks, Lincolns, the occasional Bentley and Rolls Royce.  The trucks line up, nose to tail nose to tail, like the thousands of tulips I would see in the north in the spring, bringing to us the joys of the season.  The transportation has arrived, awaiting the flock of snow birds in their wake.

Shortly after the car carriers comes the awakening of the condos, the long covered over windows and sliders opening their eyes as the hurricane shutters go to storage.  Buildings, long silent and sleepy, awaken to the wheelchairs, walkers, and grocery carts of the snow birds.

High Season is here.

We go a little slower along A1A, the headless drivers going well below the speed limit.  But instead of impatience I thank them for the opportunity to look left and right along the beach, thankful for the sunshine, the light breeze, the top down and the birds flying overhead.  If I had been traveling my normal speed I might have missed this.

We drive downtown on a Friday night, wondering why we can't get all the way downtown.  Then we remember "HIGH SEASON." That means roads closed, a live band (FREE) downtown, dancing with our neighbors and friends, enjoying the peaceful evening, the slight chill in the air, the seasonal specials and good feelings of those on vacation.

Ah yes.  High Season.  Just one of the Seasons of South Florida.

So no, I do not miss the seasons.  I recognize a different kind of changing seasons.  And Love it just as much
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Experiments in Shell fish

For Christmas I went a little off the beaten track for Americans and made Paella.  No I'm not the least bit Spanish.  But I did live there a couple years and my daughter got off the plane from Spain 2 days before Christmas.  Plus, I rock at paella.  Spaniards have told me so.

Anyway, paella (the recipe I use, from Penelope Casas who is by far the most amazing Spanish cook/traveler I have ever found) requires all manner of fish, shellfish, chicken, pork, meat.  The recipe calls for 18 small clams and 18 mussels.

Two days before Christmas, while the Captain and I were attempting to go grocery shopping only one more time for the 11 people occupying my house for a week we went to Costco.  I was shocked to see they actually had the exact types of clams and mussels I needed.  But 18?  No I had to buy 5 pounds. Of each.  I briefly considered adding a trip to the local fish market to my already over-taxed life and decided the hell with it and bought 10 pounds of clams and mussels.

Enter the frugal, cheap Girl Next Door.  The Girl who can't throw food away, who despite being "comfortable" financially believes part of the reason she lives there is because she believes "waste not want not."

SO?  I threw the clams and mussels in the freezer for another day.

Enter Friday night.  Captain and I alone  (ALONE!) in our house.  First Friday night in ....a month?

Pour a glass of rum to share over rocks...the first alcoholic drink all week and this is a major improvement over the holidays.

Decide maybe we are hungry.  Pull out the clams.  Boil water.  Google, "Can you freeze clams and then eat them?"  Decide we can.  Chop up garlic, make garlic butter, find baguette bread in need of eating, add butter, cheese, toast.  Steam clams.  THEY OPEN!!!!!  pull out meat, drop in garlic butter mixture, grab toasted cheese bread.  Grab shared glass of rum.  Put on movie, bring food to living room.  Eat.

OMG this is awesome.  If we had planned it, it could not have tasted this good!  Score one for the Frugal girl!

Fast forward Sunday night.  Day of beach, putting away final Christmas lights, doing laundry.  Dinner?  "Hey Captain the clams worked, what about the mussels?  Get some cilantro, tomatoes, I have jalapenos, onions, get some wine, steam them.  Let's try it.  Worked for the clams!"

So I chop this and that and get it all going, buy fresh baguette bread but toast it anyway (sans cheese); make salad "just in case."

Boil mixture, put mussels in....wait.....wait.....wait.   Hmmmm they are not opening.

Well a few seem to open.

Time's up.  Pull out mussels that didn't open.

That would be 90%.

Mussels that did open?  Not sure they are technically "open."

Eat one....ewwwwwwww.  Dump the entire concoction in the trash, carry immediately outside.  Eat the salad.  Eat the bread.  Hope the one bite of mussels doesn't erupt into a more interesting evening.

SOoooooo shell fish 1  Us 1.

Good to know.