Phone conversation. Mom at work. Custody status: HIS
Daughter: I went through your mail. I didn't want you to think you had anthrax.
D: I opened your mailbox, opened the interesting mail, then put it all back in your mailbox. I didn't want you to get the mail tonight and think you had terrorists or anthrax or something.
OK so it was too much to ask for her to walk the 30 feet up the driveway and put the mail in the house?! (The same key that opens Ex's house opens mine....just another twisted factoid....)