Friday, September 12, 2008

He Really Did That!

We've been experiencing some "weather" around here lately. Weather that brings down limbs and branches and trees.

Last week I had a ginormous limb in the back yard. Like 20 or 30 feet long. Thankful it didn't fall near the house or any other stuff. No damage. Just mess. I finally got around to cutting the rather tall grass in the front yard and picking up some of the larger sticks. Not my favorite job, the picking up sticks thing. Unless I can throw them in the yard next door. Wait, that would be mean. OK so I don't do that. But I think about it. Besides, Ex was out in his yard while I was mowing and picking up sticks, which precluded the throwing part. Even though NO he didn't see me and I am apparently invisible. What great superpowers I have! even with the loud lawnmower running, I am completely and totally unnoticable.

Nope, acted like there was nobody over here. I waved anyway.

After mowing, I went out back and I looked hard at that limb, but it didn't get up and walk away. I yanked on it - that was dumb and just hurt my back. Hmmm. Going to need a chain saw. Some mancake handyman teenagers. Time. Ugh. Put that on "tomorrow"'s list. Time to go to Daughter's soccer game, then my game, then bed.

Monday morning I got up and looked out my back window at the puppies - and noticed the limb was gone. The yard miraculously clean. No f'en way. Because Son was with me at soccer, so he didn't do it. And Captain lives 1000 miles South, so he didn't do it. No f'en way.

I texted Son to make sure he didn't do it. Nope.

So I wrote the gagiest, sickly sweet nicest email to Ex inquiring as to whether he cleaned up my yard and how nice it was and how busy I know he is and gee wasn't that swell of him. OK I didn't say swell. OH and b/c he'd ignore my email unless I required a response (and still he might ignore it anyway) I said, "And if you didn't do it, please tell me so that I can find and thank the person who did me the wonderful favor."

The response? "I removed the limb given it fell from my parent's tree."

That.Was.All. well, hey he removed the limb. And I said, "thank you again."


Suz said...

At least he moved it. Perhaps he does have a pulse after all.
I love the way he types back to you.....blah. blah. blah. blah.
Such excitement.
Consider yourself lucky...freedom!!!

Carol P. said...

Snerk. The year we moved into Casa de Duckfeet, there were a lot of wind/ice storms. And we had several big-leaf maples, which are known for dying approximately 10 years after their roots are compacted by construction, and throwing branches in the meantime. Our neighbors on all 3 sides had them as well -- they grow well with the various conifers in the PacNW.

So after the first windstorm, I looked out the family room window to the sight of branches coming over the fence. Before we'd even introduced ourselves (though we'd met all the other neighbors...) I don't know which branches were from his bigleaf maples and which were from ours, but we got 'em all. And it's not like we all have the same yardwaste removal rules that meant all we needed to do was break 'em less than 3 feet long and put 'em out to be picked up. Just about much work as tossing them over a six foot privacy fence.

Weeeeel, my momma raised me right, so I didn't say a word and didn't go out and toss 'em right back. But we joke about it to this day, 12 years later, S and I do. And over the years, there have been similar incidents regarding their sniffiness.

Fortunately, they spend a lot of time in their vacation home, so we don't see much of them. But just about every time we do, I think of branches flying over the fence.

Glad your neighbor was "right neighborly" about this issue.

dkuroiwa said...

Gosh...I wonder what other stuff you can have done because, you know, it his "parents' house"?!?! Hmmmm....I'd start making a list and then work on ways for him to notice that my goodness, his folks' house is falling to shit!! :-D
new fence...storm might start building a deck on the back, by your self..see what happens!!
Oh the fun you can have.

Yes, I'm bad, and I will be punished, I"m sure!! :-D
Have a great weekend!!!!

laurie said...

wow. what a stiff.

maybe he thought you were going to sue him.

Cheri @ Blog This Mom! said...

I'm going out on a limb here (sorry for the bad pun), but on the bright side, the job is done.


Matter Of Fact Mommy said...

at least he did the right thing... or something? what a dick. :)


Every time I see your blog title, I shake my head wondering how you do it. I can't even begin to imagine living next door to my ex-hole *oops* I mean ex-husband.
Kudos to you for being sweet, even if it's fakey's more than I can do!

Jennifer said...

Your invisiblity powers aren't as powerful as you thought.
Congrats on your new freedom. May many happy days come your way.

ChiTown Girl said...

Wow, that was nice, no matter what his motivation was. Aren't exs funny, funny people? Just when you think you've figured them out, they go and throw you for a loop!

Feisty Irish Wench said...

He's got some kind of long term ulterior motives somewhere. That could be the only reason for the seeming civility.

myra said...

Could that be an olive branch he's extending? (Did I make another pun?) Whatever it is, take it and run!