Friday, February 26, 2010

When Not Passing a Bar is OK

Thanks to the well wishers and positive peeps out there who give me more credit than I deserve. The whole "not passing the bar" thing has nothing to do with my intelligence or lack thereof - I know I can pass a bar (unless it's having a GREAT happy hour), but I also know you really have to study. A Lot. I met lots of practicing attorneys who were there taking it the second time because, surprise surprise, they didn't have time to study the first time.

But I asked you all "why didn't I study when I had the chance?" And kudos to Suzy who hit it spot on: I simply wasn't ready.

And I think this all has to do with The Big Move, which in many ways resembles The Big Divorce. For many years I knew I wanted to be Divorced from Ex, but the actual doing part was so hard. There were kids to consider, and stuff, and moving, and splitting up, and telling people, and being an outcast and admitting certain failures, and hiring a lawyer, and filing court papers. Etc etc etc. But finally, after many years I got up the courage, set the wheels in motion, and pulled the plug.

And Now? It feels great and I know it was the right thing to do.

Looking back on the Florida Bar experience this week, I realize that just going and taking the test, even without studying, was the right thing to do. It helped me focus, made the decision more real. And now I know that I do want to pass this - I do want to make plans to move. I might not move this year or next, but I want to position myself so that when the time is right - when the job is right and it feels right with the kids - then I will be in a position to Go.

As my sister told me, "How do you eat that elephant? One bite at a time...."

Thanks Sissy.

6 comments:

Busy Bee Suz said...

I like your sister.
This was a learning experience...and you learned from it as well as GREW from it.
Now...focus focus!!!
You have a big year ahead with the kids and then, it is all YOU sister.
xoxo
suz

Busy Bee Suz said...

Oh, not to say you can't focus on YOU now.
You know what I mean. :0

Cheri @ Blog This Mom!® said...

<3

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

Everything does seem to happen for a reason--it's great to figure out what it is.

hulagirlatheart said...

A little BBQ sauce along the way doesn't hurt either!

that girl said...

I just happened upon your blog yesterday but the third paragraph is so me! I think I knew for years but just did nothing about it..some friends who have read my blog for years have since told me they already knew..just my reading what I wrote about regularly. I finally said enough and am in the middle of "it". I feel in a good place, but still am waiting for it to be final, moving, etc..how do you accumulate so much stuff in 15 years? thanks for sharing your story with us all.