What a difference a Day makes

Don't ask me why I'm posting this from work at 1 a.m. Something about a pretrial order due and then deposition preparation and a trip to the midwest tomorrow. Oh but wait - there was the Associates' happy hour in between and the obligatory stop to say thanks to the outgoing chairwoman and chatting with friends and trading gossip and political info. Then back at the office a chat with BossMan and diving into the depths of the job, and relationships, and how lucky he is to have the wonderful relationship he has with his wife (she really rocks) and talk about clients and friends and family and futures. And then talk about some of our cases. And 2 hours go by and I still haven't gathered in triplicate the docs I need for my deposition tomorrow.

So here I am.

But First, I wanted to say what a difference a Day Makes. Last night on my way home, equally ridiculously late, Kenny Rogers came on the radio, "Through the Years." And stupid me, I didn't turn it off. Nope. I let it play. And of course cried like a stupid girl b/c that's how it was supposed to be but that's not how it is.

This morning dawned brightly and clearly. I put on my Big Girl Suit for a Big Girl Meeting with a certain Important Regulatory Body of the US Government. Feeling like a Big Girl Lawyer, particularly after Tuesday's Big Girl Argument in Federal District Court in which I pretty much beat up on the other side and had fun doing so, I was ready to rock. Anyway, on the drive in I put my iPod on shuffle, after loading up songs last night from old old CDs I finally loaded into my library. And what comes on? Gene Kelly and Singin' In the Rain. One of my alltime Favorite movies. And as I drive through the streets of DC I can see him splashing and dancing and enjoying life. And I thank God that I have a job I Love. I have a family that is awesome. I have a Special BF who gets me even though I don't know why he gets me. And Life Is Good.

And then a really old, well not really old, but old Christian Song comes on from my days of leading the children's choir when I listened to Christian CDs all the time (and liked myself a lot more in some ways): Phillips Craig and Dean "Blessing in the Thorn"

I read about a man of God

Who gloried in his weakness

And I wish that I could be

More like Him and less like me

Am I to blame for what I'm not

Or is pain the way God teaches me to grow

I need to know

When does the thorn become a blessing

When does the pain become a friend

When does the weakness make me stronger

When does my faith make me whole again

I want to feel His arms around me

In the middle of my raging storm

So that I can see the blessing in the thorn

I've heard it said the strength of Christ

Is perfect in my weakness

And the more that I go through

The more I prove the promise true

His love will go to any length

And reaches even now to where I am

But tell me once again

Lord, I have to ask You

On the cross You suffered through

Was there a time You ever doubted

What You already knew.

And I am reminded that the pain I feel - the pain of last night, the pain of some things I face daily, they are all a blessing. They are all what I need to be experiencing right now in order to Grow. And that I need to remember to turn to God in these times and He will help me through. It has been a long time since that turning to Him has been second nature. And I miss that in my life. And today, I feel very blessed indeed.