Tonight Son found a rerun of Dirty Dancin' on Cable. He confessed he had never seen it. I confess I reduced myself quickly to the status of "blubbering idiot" as soon as I started watching.
It's not just that Patrick Swayze is dead. Yea, that will make me cry. After all, I grew up on P.S. movies - and drooled over all of them. Ok ok I admit my sisters and I watched the ending of Dirty Dancin' 26 times one night. Yes I typed that right 26. So what? We would have easily hit 100 if the men had not insisted we were burning the tape....
And Roadhouse. and the Outsiders. and Ghost.
see Dirty Dancin came out around 1987. When I was in love. right before I got married. In fact, we toyed with having "She's like the Wind" as our First Dance. And so despite everything -my Rebuilding classes, my Boyfriend, my growth - it doesn't matter. I see patrick Swayze, I hear the music, and I am instantly back in 1987 when I was loved. When the future was wide open.
Back in 1987 I was going to be married to a Prince. I was going to have beautiful babies and train them up in the way that they should go. (Yes that's Ephesians). I was going to dance at their weddings with their Father and sit on a rocking chair on our front porch.
Then well, it all went to hell. And here I am 20+ years later. Patrick is dead. The Ex Is, well, the Ex.
And I? Watch Dirty dancin' and cry. incessently. For everything. For Patrick. For lost love. For people who can't dance. for Cancer. For a lost way of life. For well, I don't know. All Things Lost.