Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Don't Tell Me How To Grieve

We all have our own way of handling grief, responding to tragedy.  Don't tell me how to do it.

I am upset about Sandy Hook as is most of the world** and certainly most of the US.  I'm sad for the kids, for the parents, for the teachers, for the community. 

My way to handle grief is outrage.  My way to handle grief - after grieving for Columbine, Aurura, after living through the sniper shootings (yes that was my nieghborhood - my Ex was at that grocery store shopping the night it all began), this time I am doing more than crying.  This time I am outraged to the point of looking for ways to make a difference.  I want CHANGE.

No, I am not "taking advantage" of the grief to put forward my "political agenda."  I'm not defiling the graves of those innocent angels with my "political rhetoric."

Did you know some of the families of Newton hopped in their cars and drove to DC to voice their opinions about gun control?  Apparently I'm not the only one who is actively battling her grief.

So don't tell me NOT to post my opinion on facebook, or not to say/do anything "right now."  Don't tell me, "Now is not the time."  Maybe now is not the time for you.  And if it's not the time for you, I won't email you, talk to you, post to you about my grief and my concern.

Unlike you, I will respect that you will handle your grief in your way.

Let me handle mine in my way.

**I say "most of the world" because honestly, my daughter is in Spain right now living with a family and studying abroad.  The family is well educated, hosts exchange students regularly and has been very, very good to my daughter.  Their response to this tragedy?  "What's the big deal?  This is what happens in America.  It's how you treat each other."   

6 comments:

Suburban Correspondent said...

My son's in Morocco - sort of the same puzzled reaction there. And I agree - if not now, when?

Cheri @ Blog This Mom!® said...

Agreed. 100%.

The time to act, think, talk, challenge, advocate, and anything and everything else is now, tomorrow, and every day until . . .

Gigi said...

Sweetie, you are allowed to grieve however you need to. We are all grieving and something does need to change. Hugs.

Busy Bee Suz said...

No one should tell you how to react to anything. Go with it....your grief can do others good.
So sad that some of the world thinks this is natural for us. :(
XO

meh said...

I wonder if more people knew that other countries view us as violent if perhaps that would encourage a culture change? This is not just about gun control it's about mental health, media response, and our cultural acceptance of violence to"solve" problems, just to name a few.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

Absolutely.